Lighting up the Miami Improv with Lauren's Light

Join in a night of triumph and mirth as Lauren's Light celebrates another year of helping families in the fight against cancer.

This year's event will be held at the Miami Improv Comedy Club in Coconut Grove and will be hosted by author and funny girl extraordinaire, Andrea Askowitz. Andrea holds a special place in her heart for this function as Lauren was one of her childhood best friends. Sadly, Lauren lost her fight against a very rare cancer at the tender age of 33, just six months after delivering her second child. Lauren also leaves behind a three year old daughter and loving husband, Anthony, who, along with her parents, founded Lauren's Light.

Remembering that Lauren “was a tough critic,” Andrea continuously tried to get her to laugh. If she succeeded, Andrea filled with delight. October 8, 2009, will be no different as Andrea hosts this very special affair for her very special friend. Lauren will surely smile from the heavens as three other comedy acts - Lisa Landry, Mo Mandel and William “Rock the House” Lewis - spread the cheer and help Andrea honor the cause. There will also be complimentary catering and beverages provided by the Miami Improv, as well as silent auction items and a raffle.

Though the night will be full of light and merriment, your kindness and generosity are no laughing matter. Dedicated to helping families suffering from the many tolls of cancer, Lauren's Light is comprised of a truly committed team and your support is greatly appreciated. The organization works diligently to find professional counseling for family members, including grievance, how to deal with child-related issues, and a host of other invaluable resources and assistance - free of charge. It also helps cancer patients and families obtain educational materials referring to their specific diagnosis, along with all the options and alternatives available to them. Please note that "this information is designed to supplement the information provided by your physicians and is in no way intended to replace the paramount role of your Oncology Team."  (Lauren's Light website) 

Tickets for Lauren's Light can be purchased in advance for $50, or at the door the day of the show for $60. The Miami Improv Comedy Club is located at 3390 Mary Street in Coconut Grove (Shoppes of Mayfair). The show will start at 6:30pm and promises to light the way for a night full of hope and good cheer.

For more info:  Please call 305-740-5287, or visit www.laurenslight.org to order tickets or make a donation.

Andrea Askowitz is also the co-producer of Lip Service - "true stories out loud" and a quarterly production of Books & Books in Miami. For more information on Andrea, please visit www.andreaaskowitz.com. 

Advice, Please!

I need some advice. I love kids. I'm all about kids. They are amazing. But I mostly like them outside of my home! In between breaks of working at a childrens theater, I realize I love working there so much because at the end of my shift, they all go home!!!!!!

I'm too damn nice. I let all my kids friends in. I feel it's safe, at least they're not running the streets. But, the eating, the drinking, the sleepovers. Enough! I had a lousy $20 to my name yesterday. Went to the store, bought 4 dozen eggs (buy one, get one free) 2 loaves of bread, a pack of cheese, some turkey slices, drinks and shampoo. (We haven't had any of that in days, weeks it seems - and I know you're all feeling me on this financial dilemma.)

I wake up this morning, one loaf of bread left, half a pack of cheese and 1 slice of turkey. This food has to last all week! The best part is, I have to drive one of them home to get him out of my house and I have no gas! Then my daughter finds a stray kitten (I'm such a sucker) and she brings him home with some sob story. We already have a cat and 2 dogs! I'm too easy. Help!

Summers are too long. They all need to be back in school - and even that doesn't cover enough. Well, thank goodness for blogging... because at least when I'm on a break I can vent... and post.. and vent and post.....

The Perfectionist

Kate reached in her purse and checked her cellphone as she crossed the corridor to her classroom. She hated that Jack hadn't called.

“Morning, Kate.”

Kate brushed her auburn bangs neatly to the side as she looked up.

“Hey, Carmen.”

Carmen taught art appreciation in the room next to Kate's. Kate wished Jack shared her love for art, but to Jack art was just another possession.

“Ready for the last day of the semester?”

Kate sighed. “I hope so. I put together a powerpoint on early Renaissance and I 'm praying the disc plays for class. You know how I am with those wires.”

Carmen snickered, “Yeah - well, you can always call Diego.”

“Diego,” Kate said as she tightened her French twist and straightened her silk jacket, “...worn-out jeans, flip-flops and t-shirts. Really, Carmen, the man has no class.”

“Kate, I don't think anyone has class next to Jack. I mean, he bought you a Porsche for your anniversary.”

Kate grinned as she flipped through her purse. “He does give me everything I need.” A diamond on her finger flashed as she fished out the key. “He is perfect.”

“Okay, Ms. Perfectionist.” Carmen chuckled as she opened the door to her classroom. “Good luck with your powerpoint.”

“Thanks... Ms. Romanticist.”

Kate checked her cellphone again as she walked over to the desk. Jack told her she should understand he had a demanding business schedule.

She loaded her presentation in the DVD player and clicked the remote. Nothing. After a few tries, she walked over to the console and looked at the wires.

She let out a big sigh then pushed up her sleeves. “Okay.... let's see... out... in...” She plugged one of the wires into the video input. The screen turned blue. “Focus, Kate, focus.” That's what Jack always told her.

She dropped her bottom lip. “Video... audio... aux...” She switched the cables, using more force with each plug. “Why can't he just pick up the phone and call? I've left three messages already...” She brushed away the loose strands of hair falling in her face as she yanked at the wires. “What's five minutes out of his lousy schedule?” She jammed the last plug in the “out” jack. Everything went black.

“Great.” She looked at the mess she'd made and than at the clock. She needed help. Fast.

She hesitated, then dialed tech support.

“Hey, Diego... it's me... Kate. Listen, I need some help.”

“Sure, Kate. I'll be right there.”

Diego arrived in a snap – as always.

“Hey,” he waved his hand gently. “What's the problem?”

Kate pointed to the blank screen. “I have a presentation to show in about 20 minutes.”

Diego looked at the tangled cables.

Kate dropped her head in embarrassment, “I'm not too good with wires.”

Diego flashed her a smile, then looked back at the messy patchwork. “No problem. I'll get this fixed in a jiff.”

Huh, Kate thought. Jack would have nailed me to the cross for being a scatterbrain.

One by one, Diego started rewiring the console. Kate noticed his biceps pump as he pulled wires out and plugged them back in. Jack never showed his muscles. He said it wasn't proper.

After a few moments, Kate's Presentation showed up on the screen.

“The Mona Lisa,” Diego said, straightening out the rest of the wires. “A true beauty.”

Surprised, Kate looked up. She studied Diego's loosely spiked hair - some strands were blond, some were brown. Jack's hair was always uniform, combed neatly back, but the nonchalant style of Diego's layers framed his dark eyes and facial features perfectly.

“Well,” he said as her class filled up, “Call me if you need anything else.” A small diamond sparkled in his ear as he turned his head away. Kate never noticed.

The presentation went well and class ended. Kate gathered her belongings and checked her cellphone again. As she crossed the corridor, she thought of Diego. He was always so thoughtful. She felt a rush of emotions, something she hadn't felt in awhile. She felt pretty. She felt special. She felt like – like the Mona Lisa. Yes, Diego made her feel like a true beauty, not like just another possession!

She pulled the pins out of her twist and let her hair fall. Her short steps turned into confident strides.

She turned the corner and ran right into Diego. Their eyes met and their bodies locked.

“Diego,” her face turned flush. “I... I...”

He gently backed away and let go of her arms, but she didn't want him to. The diamond  in his ear shimmered as his dimples deepened.   

She smiled back.

For the first time in two years Kate felt alive. 

The End.

I'm in Teenage Parenting Hell!

Oi-vey! Does it have to be so darn difficult? The mouths, the attitudes, the demands, the needs, the friends, the food, aye-aye-aye! You know, after a day of battling I have to think back, “Was I this horrible when I was a teen?” Yikes! I was horrible! Mom, dad, forgive me please! I want to just slap myself silly!

But, after the storm has passed and I find a moment to breathe in... breathe out... (not that there are many)... I do realize there is humor amidst all the madness.

I rummaged through some old writing and found this piece of work. I think it was written about the time the Screamin Mama stick figure was born and I would like to share with all parents, aunts, uncles, grandparents, sister, brothers and non-parents (boy, how I envy all of you non-parents right now! LOL)

I hope this can add a few chuckles to your day and maybe even provide some stress relief.... and if you have any additional tips, PLEASE SHARE!!

10 Tips on Parenting...

1. Choose battles wisely. If you're too tired to see an argument through, leave it for another day.

2. When siblings fight, as long as they're not killing each other, it's fair game.

3. Keep the house dark and draw the shades tight. It induces sleep.

4. Get your OWN bathroom.

5. Two must have catch-all phrases: “Go to sleep;” and “Go play.”

6. Go to work as often as possible.

7. If they don't eat what's available, they're not hungry!

8. Keep plenty of extra strength Tylenol stocked in YOUR bathroom.

9. Don't have another!

10. And by God, say your prayers!

My Struggle With Music & How the Door is Re-opening

I remember the first time I heard Jimmy Page on guitar... he could play anything - something beautiful like Thank You, something rocking like Black Dog, something bluesy like Since I've Been Loving You. I was hooked on guitar. It was pretty much a playing field for men back then... the world of guitar gods - but I gladly bowed down and enjoyed.

But then, Ann and Nancy Wilson came along and well, that was it! Not only were they drop dead gorgeous,  they could sing, play every instrument and write great lyrics to great songs. Little Queen, Magazine, Love Alive, Magic Man... they were amazing! I knew right then that I had to be in a band, play guitar, sing, write great songs, and blow people away. 

 Being a trained pianist, I figured how hard could it be to learn guitar? Wrong. There was fighting to keep my fingers in the right frets and fighting to get the chords right. I would slam the guitar down over and over again. But, I was on a mission and I worked that guitar til my fingers bled - picking and strumming, picking and strumming.  I finally got callouses and boy was I proud! I would show them off, "Go ahead, touch my fingertips," I would say.

Music was everything.

I moved in with a drummer, we met a guitarist and we started a band. Moxie. I had written some songs, the guitarist had some songs and together we all wrote songs. So, we were never short of music. We just had to practice.

So, we got a bungalow, set up drums and amps and we practiced and practiced and practiced. We had broomsticks and masking tape for mic stands and radio shack mics. Boy, were we a mess... but determined! We spent all our time playing.  Every once in awhile we would get a bass player, but they never staid long. So, I played rhythm... and eventually, we got real mic stands, real mics and even some paying gigs.

As time went on, Nirvana lashed onto the scene and changed the sound of rock. I have to tell you, I loved that bottom end and I had to have me some!

Enter Mesa Boogie Dual Rectifier. 100 watts of sheer power. I saved a whole year for that amp! $1,300 smackaroos! But how I loved it. I felt so proud, carting that thing around. Everytime we had a gig, all the guys would be drooling over that amp...

"Oh man,” they'd say, "is that a Dual Rectifier????"

Oh yeah! Just turning it on is a sight to behold! First, you switch the standby and the light turns blue. All the tubes in the back start warming up. Watching them light up is like watching Frankenstein bringing life to the creature! Then you switch it to ready, the orange light comes on and you are ready to ROCK!  When I hit the strings, even my little red Yamaha made me sound like Tommy Iommi playing Iron Man! Yahoo! I was soaring!  

So, we kept playing and playing and we got really good.  We got lots of gigs, had lots of songs. Everyone knew us. There was an agent who wanted to sign us, but he was too busy at the time trying to promoting his new client, Marilyn Manson and the Spooky Kids. Who knew? Florida was great back then. The music scene was happening... showcases for original bands all the time. I was loving it!

Morning, noon and night - music was my world.  We would spend afternoons thinking of set lists and album covers and more songs. I lived and breathed music and I swore that I would only marry someone who loved music as much as me.

Enter drummer extraordinaire. He had the bluest eyes I'd ever seen. We met at an open mic night and became friends. We always ran into each other and would exchange tapes of our newest songs. When our drummer couldn't make a gig, he would sit in.

Eventually we married.  I was crazy about him. It was great, life was great, music was great, everything was great.

Enter two beautiful children. Responsibility, bills, a life we weren't used to, but I was determined to make it work. Music was still our world, but the kids started taking over.  He continued playing and I vowed to help him make it. His band had a financial backer, mine didn't.  The hope was I would help him, then he would help me.

I tried to keep my music going, but with the kids it was getting impossible. We kept recording, but soon it got way too hard to even practice.

At home, when my ex wasn't on the road, he would sleep all day. The sleeping got longer, the pot smoking more consistent and whatever else he could get his hands on at the clubs became more and more of a habit. His musical stint was almost successful, but just didn't quite make it over the top.  It was a harsh reality.

His habits became uncontrollable. He couldn't stop. Something had to give. We had two children to raise.

Aside from divorce, putting down the guitar was the hardest thing I ever had to do. But I had to. I was a parent now. A single parent. My kids took all my time.

The music door was shut. Slammed shut.

My world fell to pieces. Emptiness and darkness crept in. I felt a complete void. I thanked God everyday for my kids, and still do. They were my saviors - all that kept me going. My friends had to call me every morning just to get out of bed. I had garbage bags filled with mail lined up against he walls in my living room. I didn't want to see the bills, the foreclosure notices, the late payment notices. I was on my knees.

Then I looked in the mirror. Boy was that scary and hard. I don't think I even brushed my hair. What a mess.

Then I remember as clear as day, God calling over my shoulder and saying to me, “My beautiful daughter, wake up! There is work to be done.”

I was floored. Who could love me? I was useless, hopeless, a complete disaster.

But He kept at me.

Slowly, and painfully, the doors started to re-open. I went back to school and got my BA... finally! Only took 25 years. I started writing again, opening the mail and sorting through the bills - I even started brushing my hair again. I started working at home and have been ever since, and eventually, not much at first, I started to pick up my little red guitar again.

I still struggle with music, but the more I let all this go, the more I can let it back in. 

The door to music is still half closed for me, but it is also now half open. :):):) 

Atheist Turned Believer...

I was raised Catholic. I remember being a good little girl and going to church on Sunday morning and classes on Saturday morning. I also remember never understanding a word of any of it. I was utterly confused. So every Saturday morning on my way to catechism, I would stop to feed the pigeons. I felt so much better sitting with the birds, so I would just stay there til it was time to go home. I made communion but almost missed out on confirmation for lack of attendance. My mom was furious! But, somehow she talked the nuns into letting me attend the ceremony for fear of disgracing the family.

It was shortly after that I became an atheist. My sister did too.

It turned out we weren't the only ones struggling with our beliefs. After an emotional divorce between my parents, my dad spent years on the road trying to find himself. Instead of finding himself, he found the Lord – and Florida. Here we go...

The really good part about all this was that my sister and I got to fly to Florida for springbreak every year. How we loved the blue skies! New York was soooooooooo cold. Anyhow, dad had a little bungalow on the beach – Lauderdale by the Sea. We loved it there. When we would get to his place, we all hugged and said our hellos. Then he would go on and on about how he found God.

Oh, how we would blow him off.

"Okay, dad... We got ya."

“Well,” he'd say calmly, “you don't seem to understand....”

“Yeah, we do!”

Enough already! Boy would we get miffed!

But, Dad, the ever faithful new-found man in God, wouldn't give in. He was determined to help us see the light. After a few rounds of rhetoric, my sister just let him have it...

“Shut up already, Dad! We don't want to hear it anymore!”

Well. That was it.

My dad looked at us. He was sitting in his chair, legs tightly crossed, eyes wide open, looking like black coals, his index finger pointing straight up in the air. He said, "I don't know how and I don't know where, but my pal is going to give you a sign and you're going to know He's there!”

Right.

Time to go.

"Okay Dad, see you later."

We were out of there.

It was night time and we knew everyone would be out. So we headed for the beach to walk to the strip.

We were walking on the shore - how I loved rolling up my jeans so the water would hit my feet. We were talking about how Dad would get so worked up talking about God. He was never like that before. We just didn't get it.

After walking for a few minutes, my sister stopped and grabbed my arm. She looked down in the sand and said, "Darlene, do you see what I see?" I was thinking to myself has she gone crazy now, too? I looked down. In the wet sand was God written in huge letters, underlined three times, just there long enough for us to see it and then a wave came ashore and washed it away.

You know, I still get chills thinking about that moment. And the best part is, my sister was with me. So if I ever doubted it happened, she confirms it for me, and I for her.

I can't explain it, but after awhile, it all really started to make sense. I realized that this life is so much more than meets the eye. We live in a multi-faceted, multi-dimensional world. In fact, so amazingly multi-faceted that I know something magnificent had to put it all here. All I have to do is look at the sky or the ocean - my son or my daughter.

I mean, if I take a blank canvas, I have to pick up a crayon or pencil or a paint brush and start drawing to get a picture on it. Then I have to add color and texture and shading and layers. I have to use my mind and imagination to create something tangible, give it depth and meaning. I can't just close my eyes and say “poof!” Though I wish I could! Because it's hard work! Just like writing a song, or a great novel, screenplay, or poem. It's hard, hard work.

To every great painting there is an artist, to every great story there is an author, to every great song there is a composer.  I believe that we are all someone's masterpiece.

My dad is gone, but not a day goes by that I don't miss him. I've been spending more time on the beach and I can't help but remember that moment on the shore... in the sand...

Thank you, Dad, for making a believer out of me.  

Mangoes for Dakini

In the midst of mango season here in Florida I can't help but complain about all the mangoes that fill my yard! Everywhere I step, I feel a squish under my feet, then I almost stumble and fall. Some of them fill with bugs before I can get to them ...

Others dry up and shrivel...

There are so many, I get so mad I want to curse them...

    But then I look up. It's like manna from heaven! 

 It's amazing how I am provided for everyday in the absolute simplest of ways... and yet I still find time to complain. And then I think of Dakini and how short our time here is. I lift my head and look around.

  I see so much life. So much color.  

No longer will I complain. I will think of Dakini, sending me buckets of these delicious fruit. I will go in the house and grab a bowl.

  I will gather them and I will share them with all my family and friends. And every year when I am full of mangoes, I will not complain. I will think of Dakini, eternally dancing and blessing me with her gifts -  

-  delicious, sweet fruit, full of color and life - these are for you.  

Thank you, Josie.

In loving memory of Dakini Dancer.

The Gift

He sits on the concrete steps.
The white door atop, ajar, leading into
the shelter he shares with other
abandoned little ones, in a village
near the Blue Danube.

Today, he sits an extra moment
clutching new soles from the Cross
that’s red, to replace his -
worn and tattered.

Gazing up he grasps the warmth,
rejoicing in the new patent leathers
he’s been given today. 

For Joanne

There's this little old lady that lives two houses down from me. Her name is Joanne. She's all hunched over, her feet are crooked and I know it pains her just to walk - but she still makes time to walk to my house on occasion to share something that she holds dear with me.

Today she gave me this special recipe - a recipe for a happy home:

4 cups of love

2 cups of loyalty

3 cups of forgiveness

2 cups of understanding

2 spoons of tenderness

5 spoons of hope

2 spoons of faith

1 barrel of laughter

1 barrel of prayer

Take love and loyalty and mix with faith. (No matter how bad your day may be going!) Blend it with lots of tenderness, understanding and hope.  Now this can get tricky, cause you may not be able to find much happiness, but it's imperative that you sprinkle abundantly with laughter!!

Then find lots of warmth and bake in sunshine.

Cool down and ice with prayer.

Serve daily with generous helpings.

Happy Home Everyone!

This one's for Joanne :)

Time for Liberation!!!

Okay, so kids are back in school. Hooray!!!! I get some of my life back and now it's time FOR ME!!!! I have gained 25 pounds this summer and I AM MAD!!!! Mad is good though, because it gives you lots of fuel for the fire! So, today starts the first day for my new year of liberation. I will commit to exercise minimum 3 times a week and watch what I eat. I really have to watch the pasta! As an Italian, it's one of my biggest downfalls! And, now that the kids are in school, I have no excuse to blame them for hotdogs and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and mac & cheese and ice cream and all that other fun stuff. IT'S OVER!!! It's time for my liberation and a new me! All those that want to join in this renewal of self and spirit, please say I!!!!! I am CONVINCED that this is going to be a GREAT year for us all!!!!

New Article

The other pages on this site are dedicated to the gift of music. Here, I like to write! Hopefully, something will touch someone, somewhere and I hope to make many connections with many of you. I have read some wonderful posts here.